Those Big Decisions

Psalm 143.

Hear my prayer, O Lord, give ear to my supplications: in Thy faithfulness answer me, and in Thy righteousness.

² And enter not into judgment with Thy servant: for in Thy sight shall no man living be justified.

³ For the enemy hath persecuted my soul; he hath smitten my life down to the ground; he hath made me to dwell in darkness, as those that have been long dead.

⁴ Therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is desolate.

⁵ I remember the days of old; I meditate on all Thy works; I muse on the work of Thy hands.

⁶ I stretch forth my hands unto Thee: my soul thirsteth after Thee, as a thirsty land. Selah.

⁷ Hear me speedily, O Lord: my spirit faileth: hide not Thy face from me, lest I be like unto them that go down into the pit.

⁸ Cause me to hear Thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in Thee do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto Thee

⁹ Deliver me, O Lord, from mine enemies: I flee unto Thee to hide me.

10 Teach me to do Thy will; for Thou art my God: Thy spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness.

¹¹ Quicken me, O Lord, for Thy Name’s sake: for Thy righteousness’ sake bring my soul out of trouble.

12 And of Thy mercy cut off mine enemies, and destroy all them that afflict my soul: for I am Thy servant.

As always, this entire psalm is well worth reading and pondering. David always wrote and sang from his deep need of God’s Presence and blessing. He is transparent in his own weakness, and strong in his dependence on God. He never pretends to be more than what he is.

There is no one verse here that is more important than another, but God almost always points me to what I need in my own life. Today, it was verse ten: “Teach me to do Thy will; for Thou art my God: Thy spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness.”

We oten struggle to know God’s will in our lives, making it a matter of daily worry and concern. I do not believe God intended for us to drive ourselves to distraction with wondering what His will is. There are some things about which the Bible is not specific: Whom should I marry? What should my career path be? Should I buy that dress I really like? Should I have chocolate ice cream, or strawberry? What college? Or should I even go to college?

We can waste a lot of time and energy fretting about things that have no specific answers in God’s Word. Sometimes the answer is simply common sense. For example, should I buy the dress? Well, do I NEED it? Can I afford it? Is it a good style and color for me? Maybe I should sleep on this question. See, there is no moral right or wrong, unless you simply have three closets already bursting with clothing you don’t use 🙂 Then, the clear answer is either NO, or, perhaps it’s time to clear out things you haven’t worn in 5-10 years!

The bigger questions that don’t have clear biblical answers aren’t as easy to solve. My go-to verse here is Micah 6:8. “He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?”

So, how did I–we–decide whom to marry? I knew sooner than Terry did, because he is more of a “what if” thinker than I am. I knew very shortly after we met that he was THE ONE 🙂 Why? Well, he was a new believer, and very serious about the things of the Lord. We spent many of our dates discussing scriptural things, praying together, and discussing what we both wanted in marriage. He was already established in a job, although he wasn’t crazy about it. He was a mature adult, not a college boy. I was just finishing up with college, and was eager to move on with becoming a full-fledged adult, getting past the college thing and doing whatever came next. And there was no doubt about our strong attraction. Others saw it even before we did, and the approval of our friends was unanimous. My dad went so far as to set us up before we even really knew each other, which was an earth-shaking event. Terry was the first guy I dated that got my dad’s 100% approval. And my mom adored him because he had an insatiable appetite for her excellent cooking 🙂

So here’s a helpful set of standards in making a decision of importance: Strong interest; mutual interest in spiritual things; approval of your friends and family, no biblical grounds against what you are thinking of doing. Prayer. Always pray over a major decision.

When I was thinking of going back to school for a master’s degree, at age 50, I first approached Terry. He was behind me 100%. Then I went to my pastor, who also was wholly supportive. Terry and I talked, prayed, planned. The next step was application to the school I wanted to attend, and after an interview and a personal letter, I was accepted. There were no roadblocks, no impediments. Oswald Chambers, in his little book My Utmost for His Highest, said that when you don’t know what to do, you pray and do the next thing. The next thing may be as mundane as dusting the furniture or doing the dishes, but as you work, you can pray about whatever decision you are trying to make.

Look for the Philippians 4:7 “peace that passes understanding.” When you have that deep, settled sense of the rightness in what you are thinking of doing, you can move forward with confidence.

One last thought: Don’t spend much time in “but what if” thinking. It will keep you from moving forward, and you could miss out on something wonderful!